Haven’t You Heard? It’s ALL about the marketing!

When it comes to raising children these days, I believe everything we do with them, for them or to them (and the reaction they give us) is all about how we “sell it” to them.  To be successful you need to be resourceful, imaginative and have a background in advertising.  I was blessed to have an extremely thoughtful, intelligent and fun family raise me. My mom has a total zest for life and family. If anyone taught me to stop and smell the roses, it was her! My father taught me to have compassion for all people and to remember there are always two sides to every story. My Grandma on my mom’s side was a major influence on how I view everything- she taught me lessons I continue to use with my own children.

Back then, when I was much younger, money wasn’t abundant. My parents invested every spare penny into building their business and my grandparents raised nine children and were enjoying retirement on a shoestring budget. But can I tell you a secret? I NEVER knew that.  I thought we were the luckiest kids alive. My grandmother was often responsible for the care of my younger brother and I because, like I said, my parents were building their business. On Saturday mornings we would set out on “treasure hunts”. This was when we’d hit up several garage sales that my grandmother had circled in the newspaper. Now, if she had told us we were going to poke through other peoples’ junk in hopes of finding something halfway decent because that’s all we could afford, do you think we would’ve been as excited about it? NO WAY! We were told we were about to embark on a mysterious journey through other peoples’ things in hopes of finding beloved toys, costume jewelry, and special trinkets. She would invent stories for the treasures we’d find, spinning fabulous tales of each item’s sordid history and that made our findings all the more prized. Rummage sales at our church were heydays! We never lacked dress-up clothes.

Then there were days when we would have scavenger hunts at the grocery store. I still remember climbing into her old Dodge Diplomat Station Wagon, a long grocery list and a coupon organizer in tote. We would head to the Winn Dixie for double coupon day and we saved BIG money. I think my grandma invented extreme couponing! Exciting to most children? Probably not, but the way my grandmother built it up made it something we looked forward to! She would distribute the coupons amongst all the cousins and we would seek the items pictured on the coupon. We were divided into teams because safety was always her priority. But you know something? It was never a chore! It was a fun game because that’s how my grandmother spun it. She was a master marketer and she probably didn’t even know it. Her commission was a station wagon full of children excited to have name brand cookies and some coloring books, proud of a job well done according to Grandma’s sweet praises.

We never minded riding in that old station wagon that lacked a/c because my grandmother told us we were so fortunate to have that grand, old car that fit all of us AND allowed us to breathe clean, fresh air instead of stale a/c air. She’d tell us how wonderful the warm, moist, Florida summer air was and described in detail the beauty of each aroma in the wind. A drive up A1A was a special treat. I still enjoy the smell of Australian Pines and the ocean. She reminded us how lucky we were that we were able to experience our trips with all of our senses… We rarely complained how warm it was. We always knew who had just mowed their grass and who’s Gardenia bush was in bloom.

My Grandmother was our own Mary Poppins. She would turn her kitchen floor into a Slip ‘N Slide- putting down a little soapy water and giving us each sponges for our hands and knees. She’d let us sail across that floor in delight- laughing at how much fun we had cleaning her floor! When it was time to quit, she’d give us warm, moistened towels and ask us nicely to “put away” all the suds like you’d ask for toys to be returned to their basket at the end of playtime. Then she’d place a box fan in the doorway to dry the freshly cleaned floor while we all fell asleep, lulled by the soft hum of that fan. On a pallet of blankets on the living room floor, no bed could have been more comforting. She created memories for me that are priceless, reminiscent of Norman Rockwell paintings in my mind.

She saved every plastic container and lid for our Little People figurines so we could build them elaborate villages and towns. We would create mansions for them out of old boxes gathered from the grocery store, decorating them with markers and wallpaper samples. She also saved Ziploc and empty cereal bags to be reused, evidence of living through the Great Depression. She was a resourceful woman.

She passed away when I was 20- I’m 31 now and think of her almost daily. I adored that woman and still do. I’m the woman I am today partly because of her influence. She taught me to be kind, loving and compassionate. She taught me prayers and demonstrated what it meant to have steadfast and abundant faith. She taught me manners and etiquette, how to cook, organize and clean (correctly). I learned how to savor the deliciousness of a life spiced with ups and downs, celebrations and pitfalls.

My husband and I were driving together, taking our children to visit their new cousin last weekend and we were discussing our finances like most people do these days. He said, “Babe, our Christmas may not be all that great this year. I don’t think we’re going to have anything leftover for presents.” I laughed at this statement and he gave me a funny look. I told him, “We have each other, we have two of the most beautiful children I’ve ever laid eyes on, we’re all healthy, we have not one, but TWO Christmas trees in the attic with enough decorations to cover the tree in Time Square. We have a roof over our heads, we never go hungry, we have a collection of Christmas DVDs to watch together, snuggled under a blanket and most importantly we have Jesus in our hearts. We don’t need presents to celebrate Christmas. We just need each other and our love of Jesus .. THAT’S Christmas. Being TOGETHER is Christmas. Our children won’t remember how many presents they got, but they will remember that their parents spent time with them doing memorable, fun things.”

It’s because of the way I was raised that I value the truly important things in life. My parents taught me that family is the most precious possession you can have. My grandparents taught me to savor everyone, every thing and every moment. They taught me to have pride in what I have, to take care of it and keep it like new. People and possessions aren’t disposable- take care of them and make them last. Because of the way I was raised, I’m able to present life in a way that gives my children a zest for it. I want them to truly appreciate EVERY blessing. Be thankful for a picnic at the beach together, a walk in a National Park, dinner with their family, laughing together, loving each other and everlasting life through Christ. Aren’t these the things we should be “selling” our children?? We don’t need more stuff, we need more appreciation for each other and precious time we spend together. I want my children to have beautiful memories. We’ve already taken Payton “treasure hunting” and I save plastic containers and shoe boxes for him to color and store his Little People and cars in. We spend time together as a family talking, laughing and loving and THOSE are the gifts they’ll remember.