A Few of My Favorite Things ….. For a ROAD TRIP!!!!

When my husband told me he wanted us to drive to North Carolina (a 14 hour drive) I frantically scanned his face for any possible clue he was attempting a joke. HE WAS SERIOUS. He wanted to get into our SUV with our 5 year old son and 3 year old daughter and drive for 14 hours?! After my initial reaction of shear panic subsided, I began my ‘glass half-full’ super-mom approach. Oh, AND I had a week to round up my supplies! This momma put it in high gear and started gleaning as much as I could from Pinterest, mom blogs and Google searches. I put together a helpful guide of what I found most useful and age appropriate for a 3 and 5 year old.  If you have a Dollar Tree store near you, you’re golden! I had one large bag of activities for the kids and one large bag for my necessities. For me, organization is a must- so I’ll add some of my tips on that too.

1. Building with Felt. I bought felt sheets from Jo-ann Fabric and Crafts Store in bright colors blue, green, red, yellow and orange and then 1 sheet of very stiff black felt. The stiff felt is used as a ‘felt board’ and the other colors I cut into various shapes: squares, rectangles and triangles all of different sizes. The kids did some 2-D building with the felt pieces to make patterns and pictures. All of this was done on their laps with the aid of cookie sheets I bought at the Dollar Tree. These were so handy for so many projects! This kept them busy for about 30 minutes.
2. EZ PAINT. I found these fantastic paints at my local JBF Sale. These paints don’t spill or drip, they are non-toxic and they are totally odorless. My kids LOVED these. I just used some magnetic clips to clip their little card stock paper pictures to paint (they come with the EZ Paint) to their cookie sheet so they could paint on their laps. This kept both of them busy for at least 45 min – 1 hour. But I would do this activity as the last one before a planned stop because younger children that enjoy painting their fingers will need to wash their hands when finished. Otherwise, baby wipes clean up just as well. Also, When you’ve painted all the little cards that come with it, unruled little index cards work great and you can get a big pack from Dollar Tree.
3. Paper Towel Roll Puzzle. This one surprised me a little. I saw it on another blog and planned it as one of the activities but had no idea how much my son would enjoy it. I took a paper towel roll and wrote the alphabet on it in random places A-Z. Then I took those circle stickers you can buy at any office supply store or Target/Walmart and wrote A-Z on them (in order). He had to find the letter on the roll and place the corresponding letter on top. The stickers wouldn’t stick very well, so my son used a glue stick. When he was done he was rewarded with a fruit roll-up. This is a treat he doesn’t often get so he was happy. This took my 5 year old about 30-45 minutes to complete. My 3 year old was not interested.
4. Fill the Gumball Machine. This one was easy. I found this picture of a gumball machine in black and white. I printed each child a few and took my 1″ circle paper punch and made a bag full of bright colored construction paper gumballs. Then each child filled their gumball machine by gluing whatever color/pattern of paper gumballs into their machines they wanted. They used their cookie sheet work surface AGAIN. Never got so much out of $1 investments … This took them about 30 minutes to complete.
5. Design a Crown. I bought foam crowns from Dollar Tree and foam letter and other decorative foam stickers and let them decorate their own crowns until their royal little hearts were content. They loved finding all the letters to spell their names. Again, this activity was done on their laps with their cookie sheets. Because of the cookie sheet having that lip, the little foam shapes wouldn’t slide off their laps onto the floor. You would be amazed at what you can find at Dollar Tree. I got several ideas just looking around at different things imagining what I could have the kids do with them. Their crowns took about 30 minutes to complete.
6. Black Paper & Colored Chalk. This one also surprised me, but I decided to throw it in my little bag of tricks just in case I could sell it. Both kids liked it. It was simple- draw on black paper with colored chalk and make “night time” pictures. It didn’t keep them busy forever, but 20 minutes is 20 minutes. Plus, who doesn’t already have black paper and chalk?
7. Travel BINGO. I gleaned the net for some pictures of things I thought would be easy for us to spot from the various highways we’d be traveling. I then organized them 4 different ways on 4 BINGO cards. I had them printed at Office Depot in color. I bought these magnets from Office Depot while I was there. They were circles that had a paper backing that peeled and exposed a sticky surface. So I took my 1″ circle paper punch and punched out different colored card stock and made BINGO markers. The magnetic markers stuck perfectly to the BINGO sheet on their cookie sheets. The links to those PDF BINGO sheets are below. This would keep them busy and looking out the windows for 45 min – 1 hour. I even enjoyed playing it with them.
TravelBingo1 TravelBingo2 TravelBingo3 TravelBingo4
8. Puzzles. Dollar Tree sells a variety of puzzles and my children like the 24-piece variety. These puzzles fit nicely on their cookie sheets and I made sure all the puzzles they got on the trip were new to them. The key to keeping them entertained is keeping all the activities a surprise! I made sure to pick up 2-3 different puzzles for each child.
9. Foam Crafts. Dollar Tree had these great little foam crafts in a bag. One was building 3 butterflies and another was building 3 Dinosaurs. They had several to choose from. If you can’t find these at Dollar Tree, try Oriental Trading Company. My son had an easier time at 5 years old. My 3 year old required a lot more assistance. Don’t forget to pack extra glue sticks.
10. Sticker Scenes. These I got from Oriental Trading Company. My children LOVE these. They are simply paper scenes that the kids place themed stickers on to finish the scene. They have every kind of theme you can imagine. My children love the beach, picnic, wild west and outer space themes. They cost about $5.25 per dozen. This easily amuses them for an hour or more.

Now, for my bag of tricks I made sure to have:

• Snacks (lots of them and some special things they don’t often get- road trips are special circumstances)
• Wet Ones Wipes
• Baby Wipes- even if you don’t have babies, these wipes clean almost anything!
• Roll of Paper Towels
• Magnetic Clips for their activities to secure to their cookie sheets
• Chlorox Wipes for wiping picnic areas in rest stops
• Ziplock bags of various sizes
• Empty Grocery Bags for easy gathering and disposing of car trash
• Bowls for their snacks (disposable are most convenient or you can just use the Ziplock bags)
• First Aid Bag with ointment, band-aids, insect sting relief, nail clippers, tweezers and nail file.
• Small bills of Cash and Quarters for vending machines along the way.
• My family has a National Parks Passport, so I always keep that in my bag in case we stop at a National Park along the way.

Even though it was a lot of work planning, packing and orchestrating our trip, I had so much fun doing it. The kids LOVED their activities and they can’t wait for the next one. The 14 hour drive was scary at first, but when I gave my kids snacks, activities and my attention- they were happy, little travelers and our trip was smooth sailing. Hope you have as much success on your next trip.

The Ironies of Toddlers and Preschoolers

My young children baffle me daily. The goings-on of their little minds remain a complete mystery to me, humorous, but mysterious all the same. Attempting to even try to understand or comprehend their rationale only makes one’s head hurt, similar to the pain of banging ones head repeatedly into a wall I’d imagine. I find myself asking a three year old, “Why would you do that?” several times a day and the most incredulous part is, I EXPECT A LOGICAL ANSWER! I don’t even know if he knows WHY he does certain things. I’ve read several books and these are some helpful observations from one parent of a future rocket scientist/engineer/physics instructor/astronaut to another.

1. Toddlers/Preschoolers are constantly testing out the ‘ole ‘Cause and Effect’ theories. “Hmmm … Let’s see what happens when I fill the toilet up with lots of stuff I’m technically not supposed to.”
2. They think outside the box. “I know mommy gave me paper for my markers, and told me to ONLY color on the paper, BUT I already know they’ll write on paper ….  Let’s see what else they’ll write on .. like the dog, my skin, my bed, my sister, the floor, the wall, the couch, the computer, the window. I wonder why mommy wants me to only write on paper when they write on so much more?!”
3. The ultimate tried and true rule that nothing makes a toddler/preschooler have to go to the bathroom like a car ride. You can ask them 35 times if they have to go potty before loading yourself up like the family pack mule, shoving everyone out the door after setting the house alarm so you don’t make it go off by taking too long to close the door, locking the door while balancing all your belongings and child on your hip- pinkie finger clinging to the bottom handle and slightly tugging while your middle finger gives the deadbolt the gentle nudge it needs to engage, starting the car to get the a/c on because it’s now hot enough to cook both children faster than a microwave on high, buckle both children in their car seats, get the DVD player going because Heaven forbid my 21^st century children go anywhere having to (gasp) rely on looking out the window for entertainment, make it all the way to the end of all the dirt roads to the main highway, pull out and after one long, deep breath falsely thinking I’m in the clear for a nice, calm 15 minute car ride- guess who’s crying in the backseat because they have to pee?! Really?
4. This one can be expensive and disappointing so here goes: If you have anything requiring extensive planning and a substantial monetary investment i.e. birthday parties, anniversaries, family reunions, baby showers or vacations at least one child will get sick. Either the day or night before someone will catch a cold, puke, have diarrhea, or spike a random fever. Therefore, always keep a first aid kit that weighs no less than 35 lbs stocked with everything you could possibly need- even things you can’t imagine ever needing- put it in! If you leave on vacation, take it with you.
5. If your children are as bright as mine, prepare to buy them toys for one purpose and then see them used in every way other than the intended purpose. This one is entertaining, thrilling and at times pretty impressive. This is your kid’s ‘time to shine’. You can really see how creative they are based on how they repurpose a toy.
6. Young children have a very limited understanding of gravity. This is ESPECIALLY true for toddlers. I was hoping my fear of heights was genetic- unfortunately they have acrobat genes because they climb to the top of everything including bookshelves with little or no fear of falling off. Most of the time I don’t even know why they are climbing to the top of things- the only motivation I can understand is to get to the top.
7. This is more an irony about parenthood. I would venture to say that half of the time you think your children are the sweetest, most angelic, loving people and you feel so blessed to be their parent. You can’t even begin to think about a life without them. The other half you are trying desperately not to lose your ever-loving mind while wondering what in the world you were thinking having 2 children less than 2 years apart. Praying to God to give you the strength and grace to make it to bedtime. But then those few times you are without them, yes, you enjoy being able to accomplish or enjoy something quietly and focused, however you are also thinking only of them and missing them terribly
   

Even after all the irony found amidst the lives of toddlers and preschoolers, the fact remains that parenthood is still one of the most rewarding and challenging experiences of life. I once read of another mother comparing parenthood to climbing Everest. It’s challenging mentally, physically and emotionally- there are good days and bad. But at the end of each successful day you’ve made more headway towards the top, without too many setbacks, you congratulate yourself, get some rest and prepare for the next day’s trek.  So a “high five” to all my fellow parents that are surrounding me on Everest! Here’s to making it to the top! I hear it’s quite the view….

The “Terrible Twos” … It Ain’t Pretty!

Forgive me readers, for I have sinned. It has been 4 months since my last blog …..

Life has been hectic since my son (almost 3) hit the “terrible twos” fast and furious.  I thought I had one of those rare, mutant children that would obey, not challenge my authority or my sanity and just wistfully breeze through toddlerhood leaving us all unscathed. Boy was I ever WRONG. My husband and I were hypothesizing the many reasons for my son’s sudden transformation into an unstable, sociopathic, uncooperative, challenging, mini person. We thought he was bored, so we bought him some new toys and threw those in the play area. Didn’t help. We concluded he was teething; the pain was making him act out. You know what it’s like when you have a dull, on-going pain… makes you cranky. We gave him ibuprofen for a few days. Didn’t help. We tried a reward chart. We were prepared to reward him for doing what he was SUPPOSED to do. In retrospect, utterly ridiculous. We thought, we were all stressed and in need of a change of scenery. We took a little trip to Walt Disney World. DIDN’T HELP. PROBLEM NOW MUCH WORSE!!! “MAYDAY! MAYDAY! Does anyone copy? PARENTS ARE IN TROUBLE. WE’RE GOING DOWN! I repeat, WE ARE GOING DOWN FAST!!!!” We’ve been to Disney a few times already because, after all, I had the mutant child that listened, obeyed, traveled beautifully and was pure joy to be around. Well, that was before THE CHANGE. The child now encompassing my beautiful boy’s body is this screaming, demanding, writhing little being with very little regard to anything but his own desires and agenda.

I must warn you if your child has yet to go through it. You put your lovely, angelic child to bed one night and the next morning something resembling a possessed and cracked out animal awakens. You look under his bed and in the closets to make sure aliens didn’t switch him out and your sweet baby is tucked away neatly somewhere, waiting for you to rescue him and banish this demon that has replaced him. You begin saying his name a few times to make sure it’s actually him in that cute little exterior and not a psychopathic stranger sent by the aliens to undo you, painfully and slowly.

My husband and I began drawing straws to see who would get to leave the house and escape the madness. I took up running just to escape the mayhem, no longer comical mind you- but serious, mayhem that makes you think you’re losing your mind. It wasn’t until I went into the church bookstore on a mission that we began to have some resolve. I was going to find a parenting book. A book that would help me figure out what to do with this child. I came across the book The Well Behaved Child. Discipline that Really Works. by John Rosemond. And somewhere on the cover I remember seeing “when time-out just doesn’t work.” YES! This was the case. NOTHING was working. You know how you feel silly or just plain dumb when you suddenly discover something so simple, yet you agonized over the “mystery” for what seems an eternity?! Well, EUREKA! This book takes you back to the good ‘ole days when parents still used common sense instead of all the psychobabble garbage the parenting books are telling us to use these days. Within 5 days of implementing the techniques in the book, which isn’t really a mystery- just a reminder of good ‘ole common sense parenting, our household was restored to peace and order. It’s just a matter of remembering who is actually in charge and the book helps you to “reboot” yourself so that you’re purged of all the liberal/new-agey nonsense you may have picked up along the way. Dr. Rosemond also helped me to rest assured that I wasn’t causing any long-term damage by enforcing the rules and supplying appropriate consequences. In fact, my child is MORE fun to be around. He hugs me and my husband more. He hugs his baby sister more. He’s more helpful, more pleasant, more obedient- I would venture to say he likes the new regime. I highly recommend John Rosemond’s parenting books. He has written several. It is the ONLY thing that has worked for us. I tried so many techniques. I prayed for help and I think God led me to this great man. He’s insightful, supportive and truly loves children and God. I will be forever grateful for his insight.

“Is It Messy? If It’s Not Messy, I’m NOT Doing It!”

My son is a magnet to messes. If he’s not sleeping and it becomes eerily quiet to the point where I find myself daydreaming, even for a brief moment, it quickly dawns on me trouble is looming! SNAP OUT OF IT MAMMA! CHECK ON THE CHILD!!! HURRY, HURRY!!! It’s amazing what he can “accomplish” in three minutes. It’s embarrassing to admit how many times I’ve mopped up liquid fabric softener off the laundry room floor or scooped up powder detergent off the same floor. We switched to powder detergent so we can still use it even after it’s been dumped on the floor 4 or 5 times.  I’ve walked in on entire boxes of flour dumped all over the floor in the pantry, facial cleanser dripped on the pool deck, hand soap re-fill dumped down the drain and black chalk dust sprinkled all over the outside foyer. If airport security needs someone to empty all those confiscated bottles of unknown liquids, I know the perfect little person for the job.  Call me crazy, but I don’t understand the fascination with emptying entire contents of bottles all over the floor. Is it to see what the once neatly bottled substance looks like spread out, out of the bottle? WHY is this entertaining? I’ve been around several toddlers that sit nicely at a table and color or quietly play with designated toys, and Payton does do this a lot of the time- but then there are those times when he turns into this little, mischievous, scientific explorer that sets out on secret missions around the house the moment he can escape the “safe zone”  -the baby-proofed living room, protected with child gates to contain him. I imagine him reviewing his agenda with a headlamp at night in his crib once he’s tucked into bed for the night.

I’ve tried to accommodate his need for mess by letting him finger paint, giving him empty bottles to fill and empty with water in the bath, putting a sandbox on the terrace and letting him play with glue sticks while we glue pictures from magazines to construction paper. However, these planned mess sessions don’t seem to satisfy his compulsion. He still needs to color all over things he knows he’s not supposed to and then he SHOWS me his work and tells me it’s a “no no.” Really? You’re going to do something you know you’re not supposed to and then you’re going to SHOW it to me?! What do you do when your child tattles on himself? I loved it when he came and got me to show me the masterpiece he created while I was cleaning the other parts of the house. The laminate floor by the front door was completely colored in marker!! We both stood there with perplexed/annoyed expressions shaking our heads. I looked at him and said, “what are you doing? YOU did this?” It was as if we were on the same team, showing our disdain for some secret intruder that colored all over the floor. This is why I don’t bring any art supplies into the house that aren’t labeled washable. You want my advice to any parent about to celebrate their child’s first birthday? Go to your nearest wholesale club and begin buying Mr. Clean Magic Sponges and Shout stain remover by the case! Oh, and get your game face on, because it’s ON! Be prepared because some things are going to frustrate you and make you want to roll on the floor laughing- odd combination, I know- but temporary insanity can happen.

Parenthood is a never-ending adventure. I have never been bored mothering children 23 months apart. Each day is full of surprises and I’m grateful for such smart kids that baffle me almost daily. Thanks to them you’ll rarely see me wear white. I’m usually in shoes I can run FAST in, I have eyes in the back of my head and my hearing and sense of smell is almost as good as a hound’s. What can I say? Moms are superheroes.

You Won’t Understand Until YOU Have Some of Your Own …

I’m a mommy- a proud, loving, devoted, committed mommy. My life is consumed by this responsibility because my children are young and still need me to take care of almost everything for them. These are the years that are quick to pass, but require a full-time commitment from me. Although infants are a lot of work, I’m so thankful for this time with them. Before having children of my own, I hate to admit it now, but I would hear about this from other women and I just didn’t get it. I didn’t understand how they could lose so much of themselves and allow their identities to be based on small humans they birthed. It was a mystery. How could children, of all things, take over their lives and their minds?! It was as if my friends were obsessed with them! I was convinced I would never let that happen to me. When I had children I WOULD NOT be one of those moms …

Then I got pregnant for the first time. I was in awe of this life I was growing in my body. The first time I felt my son kick, that sweet little flutter in my belly … it nearly took my breath away and I began to quietly weep. It was real. My baby was alive and now I could feel him. This was the first step in developing our relationship. Next I would get to see him on a high-tech ultrasound that would allow me to visualize his features in an almost photographic quality. There he was! I could SEE him! I could see what he was doing as I felt him moving. INCREDIBLE!!! I was in love. I hadn’t even met him yet and I was in complete, unadulterated, beautiful, sweet love. Look at this tiny person that’s half me and half my husband, completely dependent on me for his life right now. He was safe and sound, as he grew in my womb. WOW. Then there was his birth. After an agonizing 26-hour labor, I was handed this itty-bitty miracle that snuggled immediately to my breast and knew my voice and found comfort in my arms. I still tear up as I think of those little eyes trying desperately to focus on my face during our first meeting. This moment instilled feelings in me that can only be understood by a mother that has experienced it. Not even the father, present for all of it can understand it. I’ve asked my husband and as wonderful as the emotional experience was for him, it wasn’t anything like mine. My husband sacked out that first night of our son’s life while I, who hadn’t slept in 3 days because of the labor pains, couldn’t sleep because of the sheer awe factor I was experiencing staring at our precious new addition.

I could literally write a book about all of the interactions over the years with my children, but I’m sure any good mother could do the same. I won’t bore all the non-moms with details they may not truly comprehend the significance of. The point is, when you’re a mother you can’t help but be obsessed with your children. They are the most wonderful, brilliant accomplishments of your life. Other things are still important, but not AS important. I don’t care about purses, shoes or jewelry anymore. I only shop for myself if I need clothes to keep from being naked, not to stay in fashion. My fashion most days are ponytails so the baby doesn’t rip my hair out, running shoes so I can chase a toddler, clothes that wash easily in case Payton touches me with food on his hands or the baby spits up on me and a diaper bag that goes with everything. I don’t care about nights out on the town because I’d rather be home with my husband and kids watching the Disney Channel. Sometimes my kids get sick at the most inopportune times and I have to put off my own plans, disappointed but I wouldn’t dare abandon them for my own selfish desires when they need me most.

It’s unfortunate that the details of motherhood bore some of the non-parents, if you don’t understand our sheer pride in our careers as full time mothers or our children’s latest achievements- as mundane as they may be to you they may be a major breakthrough for us. Being a mother is the hardest job I’ve ever had and probably will ever have. Running a household of 2 children, a husband that works 2 jobs and doesn’t get home until 9 pm most of the time, nursing an infant every 3 hours, endless laundry, endless diapers, 3 meals a day, 2 snacks a day, dishes for all those meals, budget-conscious grocery shopping, nap schedules, working part-time from home and spending quality time with the kids to snuggle, cuddle and love on them can be tough. I’m up between 4:30 and 5 most days and go full-speed until 9 pm when I crash into bed, 7 days a week. I’m fortunate that I can work from home, but some days it seems harder to get my work done within the chaos. I guess some people won’t get it until they’re a parent themselves. After all, I didn’t. I can only hope that if it’s something you choose to do, you will enjoy it as much as I have. I’m also thankful for so many different personalities of people and have developed an appreciation for most. I believe God made us all to do (and be good at) different things. I believe He designed me to be a mother.

Haven’t You Heard? It’s ALL about the marketing!

When it comes to raising children these days, I believe everything we do with them, for them or to them (and the reaction they give us) is all about how we “sell it” to them.  To be successful you need to be resourceful, imaginative and have a background in advertising.  I was blessed to have an extremely thoughtful, intelligent and fun family raise me. My mom has a total zest for life and family. If anyone taught me to stop and smell the roses, it was her! My father taught me to have compassion for all people and to remember there are always two sides to every story. My Grandma on my mom’s side was a major influence on how I view everything- she taught me lessons I continue to use with my own children.

Back then, when I was much younger, money wasn’t abundant. My parents invested every spare penny into building their business and my grandparents raised nine children and were enjoying retirement on a shoestring budget. But can I tell you a secret? I NEVER knew that.  I thought we were the luckiest kids alive. My grandmother was often responsible for the care of my younger brother and I because, like I said, my parents were building their business. On Saturday mornings we would set out on “treasure hunts”. This was when we’d hit up several garage sales that my grandmother had circled in the newspaper. Now, if she had told us we were going to poke through other peoples’ junk in hopes of finding something halfway decent because that’s all we could afford, do you think we would’ve been as excited about it? NO WAY! We were told we were about to embark on a mysterious journey through other peoples’ things in hopes of finding beloved toys, costume jewelry, and special trinkets. She would invent stories for the treasures we’d find, spinning fabulous tales of each item’s sordid history and that made our findings all the more prized. Rummage sales at our church were heydays! We never lacked dress-up clothes.

Then there were days when we would have scavenger hunts at the grocery store. I still remember climbing into her old Dodge Diplomat Station Wagon, a long grocery list and a coupon organizer in tote. We would head to the Winn Dixie for double coupon day and we saved BIG money. I think my grandma invented extreme couponing! Exciting to most children? Probably not, but the way my grandmother built it up made it something we looked forward to! She would distribute the coupons amongst all the cousins and we would seek the items pictured on the coupon. We were divided into teams because safety was always her priority. But you know something? It was never a chore! It was a fun game because that’s how my grandmother spun it. She was a master marketer and she probably didn’t even know it. Her commission was a station wagon full of children excited to have name brand cookies and some coloring books, proud of a job well done according to Grandma’s sweet praises.

We never minded riding in that old station wagon that lacked a/c because my grandmother told us we were so fortunate to have that grand, old car that fit all of us AND allowed us to breathe clean, fresh air instead of stale a/c air. She’d tell us how wonderful the warm, moist, Florida summer air was and described in detail the beauty of each aroma in the wind. A drive up A1A was a special treat. I still enjoy the smell of Australian Pines and the ocean. She reminded us how lucky we were that we were able to experience our trips with all of our senses… We rarely complained how warm it was. We always knew who had just mowed their grass and who’s Gardenia bush was in bloom.

My Grandmother was our own Mary Poppins. She would turn her kitchen floor into a Slip ‘N Slide- putting down a little soapy water and giving us each sponges for our hands and knees. She’d let us sail across that floor in delight- laughing at how much fun we had cleaning her floor! When it was time to quit, she’d give us warm, moistened towels and ask us nicely to “put away” all the suds like you’d ask for toys to be returned to their basket at the end of playtime. Then she’d place a box fan in the doorway to dry the freshly cleaned floor while we all fell asleep, lulled by the soft hum of that fan. On a pallet of blankets on the living room floor, no bed could have been more comforting. She created memories for me that are priceless, reminiscent of Norman Rockwell paintings in my mind.

She saved every plastic container and lid for our Little People figurines so we could build them elaborate villages and towns. We would create mansions for them out of old boxes gathered from the grocery store, decorating them with markers and wallpaper samples. She also saved Ziploc and empty cereal bags to be reused, evidence of living through the Great Depression. She was a resourceful woman.

She passed away when I was 20- I’m 31 now and think of her almost daily. I adored that woman and still do. I’m the woman I am today partly because of her influence. She taught me to be kind, loving and compassionate. She taught me prayers and demonstrated what it meant to have steadfast and abundant faith. She taught me manners and etiquette, how to cook, organize and clean (correctly). I learned how to savor the deliciousness of a life spiced with ups and downs, celebrations and pitfalls.

My husband and I were driving together, taking our children to visit their new cousin last weekend and we were discussing our finances like most people do these days. He said, “Babe, our Christmas may not be all that great this year. I don’t think we’re going to have anything leftover for presents.” I laughed at this statement and he gave me a funny look. I told him, “We have each other, we have two of the most beautiful children I’ve ever laid eyes on, we’re all healthy, we have not one, but TWO Christmas trees in the attic with enough decorations to cover the tree in Time Square. We have a roof over our heads, we never go hungry, we have a collection of Christmas DVDs to watch together, snuggled under a blanket and most importantly we have Jesus in our hearts. We don’t need presents to celebrate Christmas. We just need each other and our love of Jesus .. THAT’S Christmas. Being TOGETHER is Christmas. Our children won’t remember how many presents they got, but they will remember that their parents spent time with them doing memorable, fun things.”

It’s because of the way I was raised that I value the truly important things in life. My parents taught me that family is the most precious possession you can have. My grandparents taught me to savor everyone, every thing and every moment. They taught me to have pride in what I have, to take care of it and keep it like new. People and possessions aren’t disposable- take care of them and make them last. Because of the way I was raised, I’m able to present life in a way that gives my children a zest for it. I want them to truly appreciate EVERY blessing. Be thankful for a picnic at the beach together, a walk in a National Park, dinner with their family, laughing together, loving each other and everlasting life through Christ. Aren’t these the things we should be “selling” our children?? We don’t need more stuff, we need more appreciation for each other and precious time we spend together. I want my children to have beautiful memories. We’ve already taken Payton “treasure hunting” and I save plastic containers and shoe boxes for him to color and store his Little People and cars in. We spend time together as a family talking, laughing and loving and THOSE are the gifts they’ll remember.

Top 10 Toddler Mysteries

1. If it has a lid, it must be removed and the entire contents of the container be dumped on the floor, preferably all over something that belongs to me and is hard to clean. If time permits, Payton must then slip and slide in the mess and begin spreading the mess beyond the location of the original violation. 2. If I have the hand –held vacuum running, he must run to the nearest dog, pull a handful of its hair out and bring it over to the vacuum to watch it get sucked out of his hand. Really? Isn’t there enough on the floor???!! Must you actually remove MORE from the dogs? 3. If he’s had enough to drink out of his sippy cup, but more remains- he will suck the rest of the juice out of the cup and begin spray spitting it all over the floor until they’re so sticky the dogs’ fur gets stuck to them. Now I not only get to vacuum, I get to mop too! Great.

4. If he doesn’t want to eat something on his plate, he must remove each piece from his plate and pile it on either mine or Rich’s. One gooey piece at a time. If it falls on the floor, he will pick it up and STILL put it on our plates for us. Why can’t it just stay on his plate and he not eat it??? 5. If he gets a new set of Jumbo Crayola Crayons he will color with them for a little while, then he must peel each one so all the paper wrap is gone and begin breaking them into “more manageable” pieces. Then he realizes they’re too small to color with. This has happened three times. Who isn’t learning here, him or me???

6. He loves to throw toys for the dogs to chase. I just with he’d throw THEIR toys instead of his baby sister’s toys … Doesn’t he know toys don’t grow on trees? (he doesn’t really know what money is- better to use an analogy he understands.)

7. He won’t let me try new shoes on him at the store, he kicks and complains and absolutely REFUSES anything new on his feet. But, bring them home and throw them in his play area and the FIRST thing he does is puts on the new shoes and proudly stomps around in them. Wouldn’t he rather I make sure they fit before we bring them home???!! 8. Why is my bathroom vanity/make-up drawer the most exciting place to explore? Is it all the bottles waiting to be opened and dumped on the floor?? As long as he doesn’t want to wear my make-up, we’re OK.

9. He can turn on the TV, access the “favorites” list on our DirecTV remote control and put DVDs in the player yet he can’t put his T-shirt on. Maybe a man thing here?

10. The most mysterious yet: Before he turned 2 he was practically potty-trained going #1 and #2 on the potty. He turned 2 and decided he didn’t care to go on the potty anymore and got his diapers out. He now acts scared of the toilet. What in the world is better about diapers??!

My Children Are Trying to Melt My Heart …

I typically write about the humor of motherhood, but today my kids did something to inspire a more sentimental entry.  Chloe usually goes down for her first morning nap about the time Payton gets up. I like this because it gives Payton and I a little time to ourselves so he still gets one-on-one attention and plenty of mommy kisses and cuddles. The two of us were sitting at the table together, having our cereal, when Payton heard Chloe squeal in her room. He looked at me excitedly, hopped down from his chair and ran giggling into her room. I didn’t think much of it until he came running back to me, took my hand and led me into her room. He climbed up on her crib, his little feet squeezed between the slats so he could reach in, grab her hand and greet her lovingly like you would a great friend you haven’t seen for a while.  They gazed tenderly at one another, both with ear-to-ear grins. All I could do was step back for just a moment and try to memorize it. I want to remember detail for detail that lovely encounter between my children.  After I took a minute to admire my children’s interaction, I greeted Chloe for the second time that morning. I picked her up for a diaper change and Payton followed me to her changing table. He continued showing Chloe love by blowing her kisses and gently rubbing her belly. Their connection is something I am so grateful for. It’s something I’ve worked to establish.

The other night while I was putting Chloe to bed, I went to place my hands on her crib rail as I leaned in to say my blessing over her.  As I did this, I felt how sticky the rail was where Payton always holds on when he climbs up to see her. My first thought was, “uh … wonder what that is!” But then, after a moment, I realized that it was the evidence left behind by a brother adoring his sister, so eager to greet her in the morning that he didn’t care about his milk and cereal-sticky hands. I can’t say that I care about it either. There are more pressing issues in life than sticky hand prints on furniture. I can always clean those hand prints, but the imprints my children leave in my mind will be there forever- and it’s those prints I hope never get wiped away.

Motherhood has been one of the most thrilling rides I have ever had the privilege of being on. Never could I have imagined the menagerie of emotions that accompany it. What a gift, what an honor, what an experience.

The Hormone Haze

It’s 5:30 am. The house is quiet; children are sleeping blissfully. Yet, here I am wide-awake so dreadfully hot I fear spontaneous combustion. I look over at the nightstand and the clock/temperature gauge reads 67°. Well, looks like the a/c works fine. (We have an additional unit for our bedroom. I don’t have kid-cycles.) It’s just me and that dreadful hormone haze. As I’m lying there I can’t help but imagine what my obituary would read if I did perish because of being overheated.

“Thirty-one year old mother of two bursts into flames suddenly while lying in bed Monday morning. Her husband, a fireman, is mortified as he was unable to prevent or extinguish the flames…”

I think any woman that survives pregnancy and breastfeeding should be given a voucher for a week at the spa to be redeemed after that child’s first birthday. For me personally, I LOVE being a mother but you’ve got to admit there are certain caveats that should prequel a pregnancy. So, me being the responsible, community-minded individual that I am, have prepared a list:

1. You will probably not see your pre-baby body again for at least one year. If you plan on breastfeeding- this can be prolonged in conjunction with nursing. I can attest to this, having a body that maintains the size of an Orca Whale the entire time I’m nursing. My husband and I joke about how good my body is at maintaining healthy babies. If ever I were to experience being stuck in a frigid, isolated, barren cave while with my infant I could stay warm, have enough fat reserves to feed her for days and I probably STILL wouldn’t lose any weight! The media would enter my cave expecting an awesome story about a waif mother on the verge of death due to starvation and there I’d be- pissed off that even after only licking damp rocks for moisture and having no food, I gained a pound! But no worries, my child would also be plump and healthy.
2. When you have the hormone haze AND exhaustion it can impair you. You will discover sudden problems with your speech and thought processes. I actually want to carry a little card I can show to people while in the middle of one of these “episodes” that says: “I’m not under the influence of anything. I’m a new mother that is currently nursing my child. I apologize for any inconvenience this may cause.” I think people would look at me differently and instead of a look of confusion I’d get a smile and a nod.
3. Your internal temperature fluctuates greatly LONG after you give birth. I go from freezing to sizzling faster than a Maserati can go 0-60.
4. When it comes to certain things, i.e. something your husband said or asked you to do, a gold fish has a better chance of remembering it. I have notepads EVERYWHERE reminding me of to-do lists and pertinent details. However, I wish I could remember where I put them ….
5. On the other hand, you will get to do a lot of activities that DON’T require full brain power like watch the same DVD 500 times, color in coloring books, put together 8-piece puzzles, sing ABCs 100 times a day, or read a book that only contains a total of 10 words 300 times. Now I do have to warn you about the ABCs … this sequence does require some thought. I have been distracted right in the middle and now my son thinks part of the ABC song includes, “Oh crap, now I have to start over again.”

Good luck my fellow mommies and God Speed. Just remember that you WILL survive and despite fears of spontaneous combustion, I doubt it will actually happen, but I still keep several ice bags in the freezer and a fire extinguisher in my bedroom. Motherhood has taught me to be prepared for ANYTHING.

No Longer Shameful, I’m Able to Admit My Stroller Love Affair…

I remember the first time I saw it- that light-weight beauty.  Handlebar height perfectly proportioned for someone 5’11’’ like me. The sleek, light nylon fabric held on by super-strength Velcro so strong it holds babies securely in its throngs yet with one yank from me can be removed, cleaned and replaced almost instantly! It was magnificent. My children would love gliding it its sweet embrace and I would feel like a swift ballerina pushing it gracefully through the mall or at the zoo… You have to know this fantasy was specifically appealing to me given I just delivered a baby 4 months ago and the chances of me appearing as a “graceful ballerina” brings to mind the scene from Fantasia where the dancing hippos appear in their ironic tutus. But hey, a girl can dream!  I became obsessed with acquiring this amazing apparatus that was going to change my life! I was so obsessed my husband was on the brink of supplying me with a “Cease and Desist” order to keep from hearing me utter those magical words …”City Mini Double Stroller.” Kind of rolls of the tongue, doesn’t it?

Now I’m not someone obsessed with material things, really I’m not. I don’t own designer handbags; I don’t lust after jewelry or shoes. I’ve always been one to preach frugality and financial responsibility and yet here I was; longing for a stroller that cost more than $400, or so I thought. I began pestering my husband to rework our budget, somewhere we HAD to find the funds to get this stroller. He reminded me of the double stroller he had already purchased for me. Ah yes, the Graco Duo-glider we’d picked up at Target. As I looked disdainfully at it’s pathetic structure, I found myself feeling like the kid driving the jalopy while all my friends had shiny, new sports cars. I probably began whining like one too- shameful I know. But, I was in stroller lust. It’s a very powerful thing.

I did not give up! I was getting that stroller. Weeks went by and I watched fantastic bargains come and go on-line. FINALLY, I had an idea. I would barter for the funds.  I dialed my mom like a mad woman on a mission.  “I have a proposition for you mom …” There was work to be done from home for the family business. I was more than qualified, but with two small children how would I find the time?!. The house may have looked like a tornado hit it each evening when my husband arrived home, but I had work to do! I had a stroller to work for. I searched the Internet for the best bargain. With a little research, I found out the 2010 model on clearance was almost the same as the 2011 model. I just needed to order a couple parts.  For the grand total of $330.00 I had a brand new 2010 Baby Jogger City Mini Double stroller versus the $429.00 of the 2011. Ah, I can continue my stance on frugality! I just saved $99!! I guess it depends how you look at it. I’m a “glass half full” kind of gal so rather than profess I spent $330, let’s stick with the savings of $99!!

At the end of the week the UPS man pulled up and my wondrous, glorious stroller was delivered! I would love to say I gleefully skipped outside and met the driver with a warm smile but the truth is, I was passed out in my recliner holding my infant trying to nap. When my husband attempted to slyly slide the long-anticipated package in next to me while I snoozed (so I could wake up to a delightful surprise) I grumbled at him like a grouchy bear disrupted during hibernation. Once awake, I couldn’t wait to put it together, strap the kids in and take it for a whirl. Did it glide with precision and turn on a dime loaded with 50 lbs of children in it? You bet your baby bottles it did! Do I look like a graceful ballerina pushing it? Not so much, but I did just give birth only a few months ago- give me time, I’ve got a new jogging stroller to inspire me.